Post by HOPE on May 6, 2005 22:23:36 GMT -5
Family Code Word
When a child is without their parents -- maybe at school or sports practice -- how can they know which adults to trust? A family code word is the answer.
How The Codeword Works
Say your child is at soccer practice and an adult walks up to him and says, Hi. I work with your dad. He got stuck at work late so he asked me to pick you up.
Maybe the adult is a total stranger, or maybe he's even a real co-worker -- but one who should not be trusted with your child. You don't want your child falling for that lie.
Establish a code word that you can give to an adult who you want your children to trust. Then teach your children to challenge adults -- and ask them for the code word. If the adult knows the codeword, then your child will know it's okay to trust them and do as they say.
Code Word Tips
A code word should be a word or phrase that only you and your children know.
Don't make it to obvious, like the name of a family pet or the street you live on.
It's a good idea to change your code word after you use it
Don't Wear Your Name
Even with good training on how to deal with strangers, it can be hard for kids to remember all the rules. It's especially hard when a stranger throws them a curve by pretending that they know the kid by calling out their name.
Avoid Personalized Clothing And Backpacks
Don't give a stranger a chance to confuse your child or fool him into thinking that she knows him. Don't dress your child in clothing or backpacks with her name on it.
Don't Get Too Close To A Stranger's Car
Tell your kids -- if an adult who you don't know pulls up and asks you to come close to their car for any reason, don't do it.
Adults Don't Need Help From Kids
Kids are taught to avoid the obvious traps -- like strangers who offer candy. But predators can be tricky -- they'll ask for directions or pretend that they need help finding a lost kitten or puppy. They'll prey on a child's desire to help.
Tell your child -- adults don't need help from kids. If a stranger in a car asks you for help, it's okay to say no. If an adult in a car really needs directions they can drive to a gas station or find an adult to ask.
Always Take A Friend
This one might sound obvious to parents, but it's still a good idea to reinforce with your children. Kids are safer in numbers.
The Buddy System
Get your kids to always use the buddy system. When parents or responsible adults aren't around it's other kids who are the best protection.
Train your kids to walk home from school with a buddy. Teach them not to wander off by themselves at shopping malls, stores, movies, arcades or restaurants. Even when they use a public restroom it's a good idea to ask a friend to come along.
Learn To Scream
The last thing a predator wants is to attract attention. They don't want to be caught.
Be Loud
We teach our children to be quiet, to use indoor voices. But it's important to teach our kids that there are times when they need to be loud. Spend time at home with your kids and let them practice screaming and yelling. Teach them specific phrases to use if they're ever confronted by a child predator
This person is trying to take me away
This person is not my father
This person is not my mother
Keep Current Photos & Video
God forbid - if your child is ever missing, recent photos and some home video can make all the difference.
Keep Current Photos & Video
You would be amazed how many parents cannot quickly find a recent photo of their child. Sure they have favorite photos around and at hand, but if your child is missing a collection of current photos is critical. Children change fast as they grow up. Make sure you always have photos
showing your child with their current hair style
from a variety of angles
showing any distinguishing features such as scars or birthmarks
Trust Your Feelings
Kids are taught to be polite and nice to adults -- to respect them. But not all adults deserve your child's respect.
Don't Be Afraid to Follow Your Instincts
Make sure your kids know that it's okay to trust their instincts. Let them know:
If someone makes you feel scared or uncomfortable get away from them as fast as you can. Don't be afraid to tell your parents or a trusted adult if you feel scared or uncomfortable or confused.
Get Away - Fast
At the first sign that things aren't right, your kids need to get out of a situation as fast as they can.
If A Stranger Follows You
If they're on foot then run as fast as you can -- run toward a place where there will be more people. If they're in a car turn around and go in the opposite direction. It will take them time to turn their car around
Home Alone
Even if your child doesn't routinely go home alone after school you should establish some simple rules for the times when your children are home alone. Going over them periodically and reinforcing them will make them stick.
Home Alone Rules
If you go home alone after school always look around before you go inside your home -- make sure everything looks okay.
Once you're inside call you parents to let them know you're home safely.
Keep the door locked
Only open the door for trusted family members or friends who your parents have pre-approved.
Don't tell people that you're home alone
If you get scared or something doesn't seem right, then call for help
It's Okay To Say No
This is probably the most important tip there is, because if your child is afraid to say "no" to adults then all of the other tips and training won't be effective. Empower your child to say "no" when he senses danger.
Just Say No
If an adult you don't know tries to talk to you or offer you a gift
If an adult you do know tries to touch you or treat you in a way that doesn't feel right
If any adult makes you feel scared, confused or uncomfortable
Remember to tell always your parents about it
When a child is without their parents -- maybe at school or sports practice -- how can they know which adults to trust? A family code word is the answer.
How The Codeword Works
Say your child is at soccer practice and an adult walks up to him and says, Hi. I work with your dad. He got stuck at work late so he asked me to pick you up.
Maybe the adult is a total stranger, or maybe he's even a real co-worker -- but one who should not be trusted with your child. You don't want your child falling for that lie.
Establish a code word that you can give to an adult who you want your children to trust. Then teach your children to challenge adults -- and ask them for the code word. If the adult knows the codeword, then your child will know it's okay to trust them and do as they say.
Code Word Tips
A code word should be a word or phrase that only you and your children know.
Don't make it to obvious, like the name of a family pet or the street you live on.
It's a good idea to change your code word after you use it
Don't Wear Your Name
Even with good training on how to deal with strangers, it can be hard for kids to remember all the rules. It's especially hard when a stranger throws them a curve by pretending that they know the kid by calling out their name.
Avoid Personalized Clothing And Backpacks
Don't give a stranger a chance to confuse your child or fool him into thinking that she knows him. Don't dress your child in clothing or backpacks with her name on it.
Don't Get Too Close To A Stranger's Car
Tell your kids -- if an adult who you don't know pulls up and asks you to come close to their car for any reason, don't do it.
Adults Don't Need Help From Kids
Kids are taught to avoid the obvious traps -- like strangers who offer candy. But predators can be tricky -- they'll ask for directions or pretend that they need help finding a lost kitten or puppy. They'll prey on a child's desire to help.
Tell your child -- adults don't need help from kids. If a stranger in a car asks you for help, it's okay to say no. If an adult in a car really needs directions they can drive to a gas station or find an adult to ask.
Always Take A Friend
This one might sound obvious to parents, but it's still a good idea to reinforce with your children. Kids are safer in numbers.
The Buddy System
Get your kids to always use the buddy system. When parents or responsible adults aren't around it's other kids who are the best protection.
Train your kids to walk home from school with a buddy. Teach them not to wander off by themselves at shopping malls, stores, movies, arcades or restaurants. Even when they use a public restroom it's a good idea to ask a friend to come along.
Learn To Scream
The last thing a predator wants is to attract attention. They don't want to be caught.
Be Loud
We teach our children to be quiet, to use indoor voices. But it's important to teach our kids that there are times when they need to be loud. Spend time at home with your kids and let them practice screaming and yelling. Teach them specific phrases to use if they're ever confronted by a child predator
This person is trying to take me away
This person is not my father
This person is not my mother
Keep Current Photos & Video
God forbid - if your child is ever missing, recent photos and some home video can make all the difference.
Keep Current Photos & Video
You would be amazed how many parents cannot quickly find a recent photo of their child. Sure they have favorite photos around and at hand, but if your child is missing a collection of current photos is critical. Children change fast as they grow up. Make sure you always have photos
showing your child with their current hair style
from a variety of angles
showing any distinguishing features such as scars or birthmarks
Trust Your Feelings
Kids are taught to be polite and nice to adults -- to respect them. But not all adults deserve your child's respect.
Don't Be Afraid to Follow Your Instincts
Make sure your kids know that it's okay to trust their instincts. Let them know:
If someone makes you feel scared or uncomfortable get away from them as fast as you can. Don't be afraid to tell your parents or a trusted adult if you feel scared or uncomfortable or confused.
Get Away - Fast
At the first sign that things aren't right, your kids need to get out of a situation as fast as they can.
If A Stranger Follows You
If they're on foot then run as fast as you can -- run toward a place where there will be more people. If they're in a car turn around and go in the opposite direction. It will take them time to turn their car around
Home Alone
Even if your child doesn't routinely go home alone after school you should establish some simple rules for the times when your children are home alone. Going over them periodically and reinforcing them will make them stick.
Home Alone Rules
If you go home alone after school always look around before you go inside your home -- make sure everything looks okay.
Once you're inside call you parents to let them know you're home safely.
Keep the door locked
Only open the door for trusted family members or friends who your parents have pre-approved.
Don't tell people that you're home alone
If you get scared or something doesn't seem right, then call for help
It's Okay To Say No
This is probably the most important tip there is, because if your child is afraid to say "no" to adults then all of the other tips and training won't be effective. Empower your child to say "no" when he senses danger.
Just Say No
If an adult you don't know tries to talk to you or offer you a gift
If an adult you do know tries to touch you or treat you in a way that doesn't feel right
If any adult makes you feel scared, confused or uncomfortable
Remember to tell always your parents about it